Exreality.NET

Recently shadow explained what Californians didn’t understand about rain, and the post gave me the idea of talking about rain in Washington. But then I realized that an inexplicable inability to drive in the rain was just one of the many reasons that Washington sucks. Don’t get me wrong, I love Washington state. I’m proud to live here. But the following is a list of 10 things that truly suck about Washington.

1. People who can’t drive in inclement weather conditions, despite the fact that inclement weather conditions are all we ever have.

2. We reelected a horrible woman as governor, despite multiple shortcomings and questionable leadership, not to mention the fact that she looks like a zombie or some other type of undead being.

3. Everyone is too courteous at 4-way stop intersections, causing obscenely large and unnecessary backups.

4. The eastern part.

5. Specifically Spokane.

6. WSU and UW football.

7. People are obnoxiously outdoorsy. Rent a movie and stay in for once, you freaks. And rain is not “perfect weather” for mountain biking/fishing/kayaking/living in a tent on Green Lake.

8. We emit as much carbon dioxide driving cars as we do moaning and groaning about global warming.

9. It has two ugly, cancerous, rotting, and smelly growths: Idaho and Oregon.

10. The politics surrounding the replacement of the Alaskan Way viaduct. We’re not going to make a decision until 10 years after the horribly tragic collapse which will inevitably kill hundreds of people as a result of political ineptitude in this state.